Rednecks Dine In Tuscany

Italian soda. Ricotta. Ravioli. Gelato. Friends, make no mistake. The Name family are connoisseurs of fine dining. That's why a city just ain't a city without a proper Tuscan-style restaurant and a birthday just ain't a birthday without consuming mass quantities of fake Italian food at the local Olive Garden Restaurant.



It is no secret the Name family proudly descends from Indiana's finest rednecks, and along with our Tennessee cousins, we spare no expense in celebrating special occasions with our kin. January 30th marked two anniversaries in our family as the Skipper reeled in his 61st year and my brother-in-law Justin hooked his 32nd. Being the supportive family we are, we all gathered together to wish them another happy year of fishing, hunting, fishing, four wheeling, fishing, and all around outdoor roughing it.

The Name girls revere birthdays as a daring invitation to introduce our youngins into the urban sector. Guests privy to our dining adventures know when the Name cousins get together, social graces fly into the stratosphere. Amidst their squeals and vies for attention, you are sure to find one hiding under the table, one running around the table, one climbing onto the table, and one swiping chugs of soda while the others aren't looking. At times like these, we would like to hitch them all to a post for safe keeping, yet we realize we have to have an air of sophistication in fancy places such as this. That's when the daddies turn on their nad-knotted bull charm and give them the 8 second smackdown.

One of the reasons we enjoy the Olive Garden is for its warm and inviting decor. The deep gold and green hues really draw a person into the charming countryside of Italia and you can't help but be swept into the landscape with the clusters of plastic red grapes hanging from faux green vines overhead. Music from the Rat Pack plays softly in the background and you think to yourself, It just doesn't get fancier than this. However, the carpeted floor did appear a little bare without peanut shells strewn about so the kids wrestled their sodas to the ground and thoughtfully scattered crayons and bendy straws to give the party a homey kind of feel. If you ask me, it was a much needed improvement.

A second reason we love the Olive Garden is for the palate pleasing appetizers. Dad and Sandy enjoyed their favorite stuffed mushrooms while the rest of us subsided on buttery breadsticks, oil drenched salads, and cream based dipping sauces. Xavier reveled in his own excitement for the sugar packet display; he tore into the individual packets pixie stick style and downed them like a true Olympian.


(Sandy, Dad, Erika, Andi, Angie, Christian, Kyle, Justin, Jaxon, and Xavier. Livi is not featured as she was hiding under the table.)

Thank you, Olive Garden, for being such a hospitable host. The a cappella ensemble added to the festive ambience as the kids nibbled on their gourmet cheese pizzas. We may be country folk, but we know fine Italian cuisine when we see it. Bon Appetit!