Amonett Asylum: Half Baked?

Gestation: 19 weeks
Weight Surplus: 17 lbs.
Additional Props: Overly hyped up 3 year old
Weeks Til Weight Watchers Gets My Business Again: 21

If this baby delivers at the same gestation as Xavier (38 weeks), then she or he is officially half baked!
And according to Xavier, not only do I have a bun in the oven, I also have one in my chest. He pointed to my officially full-figured left bust and asked me if there was a baby in there too. I wish, kid! That would be another 8 lbs. I would not have to run off or pay Weight Watchers to starve off of me!

Until I waddle your way next week...

How Sweet He Is

11 September 13

While reading a book to me...

Every week we go to visit Aunt Yoko.
X: "That's weird. If I had a grandma named that, I would just call her grandma."

July 2013

X: "Mom, why are you so slow? You take forever. I think you should pray to Jesus to make you faster."

4 January 2013

X: "Mom, do you have blubber? You know, on your body like killer whales?"

Me: "Well, I do have some extra layers of fat I'm trying to get rid of and Grandpa Skip has always warned me about the dangers of wearing black bathing suits."

23 June 2012

X: Mom, can I have a Hershey Kiss and a Kitty Kat?

6 February 2012

Me: X, will you please stop banging that metal on the table?
Xavier: Why, Mom, are you trying to think?

Me: X, what would you like for dinner?
X: Steak with no crust.

January 2012

Me: Xavier, pick out a book for me to read to you before bed.
X: I don't want you to read me a book. I want you to tell me a story about Jesus.

I promptly went to Seagull to purchase some children's stories of the Old and New Testament. Telling stories from memory is too much pressure!

I'm 4

13 January 2012

Xavier has matching Match Box monster trucks in two sizes. They both have the Superman insignia on the hood.
Xavier: Mom, the big truck is for Superman and the little truck is for Wonder Woman.
Me: Why does Wonder Woman get the little truck?
Xavier: 'Cause she doesn't know how to drive the big truck, Mom.
Me: We'll see about that.

27 November 2011
Thaus: X, which church do you belong to?
Xavier: The Church of Heavenly Father of Latter-Day Saints.

13 November 2011
Me: Xavier, it's almost Thanksgiving. What are you thankful for this year?
Xavier: Jesus.

Late October 2011
Xavier pulls up a bar stool next to me while I am sitting in the kitchen writing articles.
Xavier: Mom, I broke your pumpkin.
Me: What were you doing with my pumpkin?
Xavier: Mom, I'm a man. I'm in charge here.

9 October 2011
Me: Xavier, we need to figure out what Santa Claus is bringing you this year.
Xavier: Um...probably presents.

16 September 2011
while jumping on the couch
Xavier: Gram, have you ever seen a white boy jump like this?

X's Whit & Whims

June 2011
bedtime prayer
X: Thank you for Momma and Dad. Thank you for Captain Hook. Please bless Lehi, Santa Claus and Jesus. Amen.

4 June 2011
Me: Xavier, you left the water running in your bathroom. You must remember to turn it off after washing your hands. Water isn't cheap. It costs a lot of money to keep it running.
X: It's okay, Mom. Dad will make it.

17 April 2011
during bathtime
X: I want to be a king.
Thaus: Unfortunately, buddy, we don't live in a place that has kings. We have a president. Do you want to be president?
X: No. I want to be a king.

11 April 2011
another bedtime prayer
X:...thank you for Lehi, Santa Claus, and Jesus...

10 April 2011
saying his bedtime prayer
X: Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for mommy and daddy. Thank you for baby Emerson. I'm Optimus Prime. Amen.

9 April 2011
while taking a bath with baby brother
X: Get me out! Get me out! I don't want baby pee on me! Why can't baby pee in the toilet?

18 March 2011
Me: Xavier, are you going to marry a girl when you grow up?
X: No. I'm going to marry Mommy.
Me: But what about Daddy? I'm already married to him. X: Daddy can marry another girl.
Me: What other girl?
X: Sammie! (X's 4 yr. old cousin)

8 March 2011
Gram to Emerson: You're my little sweetheart.
Xavier indignantly: He's not a sweetheart! He's a pumpkin!

Big Brother

February 13, 2011
Xavier came home from church very upset that he didn't get to be the leader in a game.
Xavier: I wanted to be the leader.
Me: As much as you want to be the leader, other kids want to be the leader too. We have to take turns being the leader.
Xavier: No! Only me, Daddy, and baby brother get to be the leader. No one else!

January 27, 2011
Xavier: Can we put baby brother back in your tummy?

November 2010
Xavier (perusing a toy catalog): I want to buy that. Me: You do? Do you have any money?
Xavier: Yeah.
Me: What money do you have?
Xavier: Daddy's money.

October 2010
Me: What do you want to name the baby, X?
Xavier: Cicle (Sic-kull)
Me: You really want to name the baby Cicle?
Xavier: Yeah, Cicle.
I sense a pattern forming here...)

July 2010
Me: Are you having a baby brother or a baby sister? Xavier: I'm having a cicle.
(Xavier loves motorcycles and calls them "cicles". How disappointed he will be when January rolls around.)

July 17, 2010
Me: What should we name the baby, X?
Xavier: Sucker.
Me: You want to name the baby Sucker?
Xavier: Yeah, Sucker.

Amonett Asylum

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Half Baked?

6 comments:

FEEDJIT Live Traffic Feed

About Me